Gillian Is Normal

Gillian is normal
She lives on her own
She’s got a flat in the city
She’s got a grey telephone
Gillian does not take drugs
She does not go insane
She does not try to kill herself
She is immune to pain

Gillian is normal (x 3)

She was born in Barnsley
But her father came from France
She does not have twelve fingers
She did not learn to dance
She goes to the cinema on Friday
And thinks she is Clark Gable
She keeps a magic monkey’s paw
In a drawer in the kitchen table

Gillian is normall (x 3)

Boyfriends line up at her door
The queue stretches down the street
But Gillian is not interested
She tends not to eat meat
She watches television
Crossroads and News At Ten
And if she turns the sound down
There is no difference between them

Gillian is normal (x 3)

A million housewives every day
Put down their tins of beans and say,
"Thank god everyone’s normal
Thank god everyone’s normal
Thank god everyone’s normal
These days"